Day Thirty Two


Did you remember what I have mentioned about plans, hanging out to take some photos of London etc etc?
Failed attempt as basically 50% of everything in my life!
Today the weather was crap; my complete lack of motivation sucks; knowing that tomorrow will be Friday sucks even more!!!
I’m pissed off to hear the voices inside my head, my life has been a mixture of emotions which lead me to nowhere.
I feel like laughing and crying at the same time, I feel loved but still alone, I feel glad but sick…
I feel happiness with sorrow, fearful but I know that I need to be brave, I see difficulties and certainties everywhere and I wish I could stay but needs must…
And that’s the reason why I have been considering strongly the possibility of committing “social suicide”. I am weird, with plenty of troubles, my days showing me that I’ve been doing the wrong thing since 1983, often I enjoy the fact that I can easily avoid or ignore people just because I don’t want to give them the answers which I don’t have…
Please don’t blame me, it will be better for everybody as I suppose no one loves to hear others complaints 24/7 and at the moment I have nothing else to offer but this…
However in some ways I feel sorry for not making the best of my life but yet I accept me as I am.

?!

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