Posts Tagged ‘milan’

Day Two

February 17, 2011

I’m still in London…

And I really wish the circumstances were like a “liddle bit” different. At least I’m not alone and eventually things will be sorted out quickly. I keep repeating to myself “just breathe, nothing happens without a reason…” So let me see what the others will say to me tomorrow and afterwards decide what I’m going to do. At the moment I’m waiting (but not so patiently) to find out what God prepared for me this time. Anyway as the optimists often say “if there is still hope, do not give up, just give a shit”
The hardest thing has being to keep calm, focused on my extra issue without losing faith or treating people badly around me!
But yeah, better winds are to come soon…

I am trying to…I really am

Now I’m ready!

January 25, 2011

Hello there. I’m back! I know, it’s been a while… but my absence wasn’t a choice. From my side I’ve missed you all, although I’m not so sure if you noticed I wasn’t here or if you even missed me at all, but it’s all fine.

Well I don’t know where I should start this post, but I might just put it all together, short and in one…

A new whole year has just started.
So far everything seems to be in the right place this time, even though I do not believe very much in “right & wrong”.
Anyway, many things are still going to change, some others have already changed for the better and a few others remain the same as before, as it should be. I’m still living and working in Milan, the city that I chose to call my “home” at least during the past two years and a bit… Since November last year I’m living for the very first time in an apartment on my own. My flat is about 30m2, and is just beautiful and located in a good area of town, near the centre. And now I finally have everything I need, and that includes even the Internet! Being very honest with myself, it is definitely priceless that I can do whatever I want whenever I decide to!

Regarding my professional life, I am still on the same road. I’m still being a type of freelancer for the Fashion business, and from time to time I also work for a Photographic Studio, which is nice. I have my fabulous agenda with so many contacts and that’s what keeps me safe while I’m here. By the way, I have decided to finally start my “camera collection” and I already have 5 old cameras plus my precious Nikon D5000 (useless information, sorry about that. Wasn’t my intention to make you jealous).
Whatever, I think I’m doing very well and much better than last year, in the same season when everything was so unclear to me… Life is still uncertain, but now I know much more about my potential to “get what I want”. I really believe in the power of words and I’m sure that I was born to be and make people around me happy! I have no limits as I take every obstacle as a lesson. Of course I still have my flaws, I still make people cry, and obviously I am still getting hurt by that, but come on, the little “Me” without defects and flaws is as boring as any other normal girl and honestly I do not want to be like everyone else!
Let me see what else I can say here….
Well, a few months ago I found out that I’m going to be an A-U-N-T-I-E and that’s amazing, I mean, pretty new for me! My sister is pregnant (about 13 weeks now), my family is getting bigger and I’m so proud of them! But still I’m living my life abroad and I will not deny that I feel a little bit guilty about my “eternal absence”… I hope that somehow they understand my decision to pursue happiness this far from home. I really wish I could be there when the new baby is born, although I’ll be there in August for my birthday so not too bad and this time I’m not going back to Brazil alone! I feel very lucky to have my boyfriend going there with me, and perhaps this time I will not feel so lost. Fingers crossed…
Now talking about my dear boyfriend…It is still the same one I had last year and luckily we are becoming stronger than ever, building our solid relationship that has just passed its first anniversary! Who knew I was able to handle that for so long but the more time passes, the more we know what we want for the future. So I am positive that this time I’m not throwing away my youth or simply wasting my time with someone that doesn’t deserve my best, even when we are separated by miles. Everybody knows that he isn’t close to me all the time (physically speaking) but whenever I need him, he is the first to stand and be ready for me. He has been not only the love of my life, but he is also my best friend, and this is perfect because we can count on each other more than 100%. Of course we both have our “periods”, with ups and downs, but we’re doing very well with our relationship, even with these setbacks. And I really hope that this year I will be able to visit him more than I have done in the past.
Yet looking back in time, I venture to say that 2010 was a good year, but very strange in general. 2010 for me was full of ups and downs, victories and defeats, all or nothing but at the same timeI’m grateful, regardless of what happened, for what I have.
Now I am wishing for a wonderful 2011, full of new goals and a bit closer to those I care for the most, family, friends and the love of my life!

Cheers everyone! I’m ready, who’s coming with me?

Yeah, Yeah!

About a Love Story

December 17, 2010

Isn’t easy to keep a love story by distance but it’s not impossible either!
Physically we are about 956km or 516 miles away. Emotionally and mentally just 2 clicks from a Skype conversation or a phone call…
Believe you or not but we have been doing that for the past 11 months, in which we have experienced extremely feelings, going from good to bad though but always getting back to the right road… always getting back to the each other arms. And hopefully neither of those kind of ‘falls’ we’d were deep enough to bring us down and make us want to quit of our love.
Actually, not only speaking for myself, we both agreed that it made us even more stronger than we had ever thought we was or what our feelings for each other could be about.
Exactly now we’re apart, but I’m going to go to see him soon again and whenever I think of him I try to imagine him as words in my head: clever, charming, a bit stubborn, extremely sexy, witty…
Or as dreams that coming during my nights and days, without control, gracefully and unforgettable…
While we are apart I try to somehow form a perfect memory of him, of ‘us’ as pictures which remained in my mind forever. I do that in the way that comes to me most naturally – using words. And that is the reason why I am filling on this white and boring (virtual) piece of paper…
I have missing him so much theses days!
I miss the way he used to look at me in the morning, the way he used to hug me tight every time I dared to put my head on his chest, the way he smiled at me making me smiling back at time… I miss his good smell, his incredible voice and his adorable blue eyes… The way how he used to staring on me when only the comfort silence was what remained between us. Sometimes his gaze were full of wonder and others full of silly doubts and certain wishes that also I was having. We are so alike and I might to confess that it scares me and surprise me at the same!
When I keep myself looking back at the past, I stay proud in say that honestly do not regret about anything what I done in my life; and have him feeling safe now to diving inside my world completely is one of the best things that I will never forget from 2010. We are just like wine, we are getting better and better with the time.
We know that the time are passing, and we won’t to lose a chance to look forward. Life must to go on, no matter happens just with what make us happy and I definitely cannot wait for what 2011 will bring to us!
I’m so fortunate and I do recognize this! We will have the possibility to be watching the New Year’s Eve together in London; I will be where I supposed to be most of time, I will be at his arms and I think I should be mandatorily grateful every single morning for have met him! Because chances of found without even being looking for one so good guy as him and get it as my boyfriend – one in a billion!
I will not deny that sometimes I cry without a reason, that sometimes both of us wished just have one second together to punch each other face… That the lack of his presence in my days is painful or that I’m holding so bad for the future, for our future close together.
We have no more secrets and we’re trying hard to not get or let the other hurt.
He opened my eyes to see that our relationship is built not on the sand, not at the daily routine or into just sex and promises that were made to being broken, but instead of, it is building on honest and clear conversations, strong feelings, whishes and in one insane and unsatisfied will of more and more!
Yes, I love him as I have never thought I could love somebody like this before.
We are unique and I want to be this way for a long long time yet.
Yes, I want him to want us to last forever!


No doubt, one of my favourite pictures of ‘us’!

I do not get tired of read it every single day…

La Dolce Vita

September 25, 2010

Sweet you and I...

Insieme a te tutto sembra molto piu bello…
Mi manchi cosi tanto che a volte vorei proprio tirarti fuori dei miei sogni per riabbracciarci davvero.


July 28, 2010

‘Love’ was when you pass by me accidentally
Was when the distance was measured by a phone calls and just a few minutes away.
You grabbed a sense of my smile, my total attention and much more…
But between ‘us’ there is nothing that could last for more than just nights.

I wished I could have shown you only the real ‘me’, the normal girl
So I can’t…
Now, we are not so ‘right’, but even not so that ‘wrong’.
You’re careful with yourself when you say “I won’t to surrender by ilusion, I don’t know what to do”…
And me either but just let’s live for a day, like there is no ‘tomorrow’!

We’re different, yet the same.
Now I need to effort every time that I cannot no longer see you to see
When we cannot just feel to feel
The power of you touching me, kissing me, hugging me, then leaving me…I will never forget.
Now I’m alone tonight I don’t know where you are.
But that’s okay, because soon I will find a way to bring you back to me once again,
As always pretending that could be forever even knowing that it might be the last time.


super quero!


05th of July was a day…

July 5, 2010

Just a phrase about the concert:


great location (very near by my place – so convenient)
nice people
-and they were perfect playing live (despite of the long delay to start…)

Basic Space‘, ‘Stars has made me cry (ok, I’m joking…)! Well, it was just another big concert I had the opportunity to check while I’m living here in Milan.


'Night Time' moment...


ps: perhaps I’ll go to see them again in London…
and with my boyfriend this time (sighs)

An letter to my ex

April 2, 2010

Everybody knows that since Vitor Shalom broke up with me almost one year ago, I never saw him again even living at the same city. Well, I didn’t had reasons to look for him because I always knew that OVER is over, hurting or not…
I cut him definitely from my life so no emails, no phone calls, no network profiles, nothing! Was hard at the begining but I did it. I choose for doesn’t  know anything else about his life.  I didn’t had reasons to keep it after everything that happened.
But when I knew by chance that he was going back to Brazil I thought ‘well maybe is time to do one thing, maybe is time to surprise’. So I went there, on the same flat that we used to live on the past, just to give one letter and to see his face for the last time on my life. From now (02th of April 2010), I have no longer the risk to find him on the streets of my city anymore, yes Milano now is all mine.

Follow bellow my lastest letter for him:

To the boys who once has broken my heart:

It took me so long till I got over them all, perhaps some were harder than others but it definitely ended for everyone.
One of you started dating a new girl to replace me when I still were there though, needing you, and only I know how tougher it was… The time I could have spent having fun, laughing with friends or meeting new people was wasted on thoughts of you. Could you tell yourself why did you do that? Anyway, for me it doesn’t matter anymore.
One of you treated me as shit, fooled me for years and I just don’t understand how could I be so blind… if it wasn’t me the one who you wanted to spend your whole life forever…
You all taught me the reasons why half of the most beautiful songs are about broken hearts and failed romances.
You all taught me the reason why I should stay away from boys who seemed a bit smooth, who always seemed to have a line or witty repertoire that at once flattered and humored.
You taught me to considerer above the fact that I don’t love you anymore that maybe I could never have done that even before
I am moving on grateful for everything I learned because now I don’t need you anymore, not even on my thoughts so just be happy for me, be happy for you too.
I wish someday someone else can do with you what you did to me and other girls… let’s see if you will go through and get so far as I have done.
You taught me how to be the girl I am today.
Thank you so much for making me stronger!
Met vriendelijke groet,
Carol Vallu


Yeap, now that's me!

‘Always for you’

March 4, 2010

2h46a.m and I just got home…

I have one indescribable feeling inside of me right now and that’s wonderful! Tonight I went on the “THE ALBUM LEAF” concert at Circolo Arci Magnolia – one place to get back there more times (thought). Ambient super underground with a such nice acoustic for presentations / shows and other good point: drinks on the bar aren’t expensive at all! Genial!

About the concert…wow the concert…I have no words to discribe the atmospheric, the sound, even the people there inside hmmm really was everything (almost) perfect. I had fun and enjoyed from the begining till the end! They played for aproximately for 2hours and just made an short break for 5min, nothing more nothing less than that! I were in good company – tks Marcelo for being there with me. But I will confess that I was thinking lots about someone else very special  I got my mind set all the time on my ‘boyfriend’ and definitely I would loved to have had shared this fantastic night with him… #sighs

No doubts one of the great moments was when they played “ALWAYS FOR YOU”! First of all because this song is one of my favorites and also because they played it with so energy was so powerful watch the live performace. The fans could felt the ‘mood’ and yes we all being singing, jumping, recording, making pictures during all the time – truely I  have been there present more than 100%!


Was fantastic!



…”all the memories will never fade
For years and years
In my heart you’ll stay”…

Happy Valentine’s Day!

February 14, 2010

L.O.V.E for all those ones who know how to love…

G.R.A.C.E for who trust in fate and smile without thinking twice of the ‘unexpected’…

S.T.R.E.N.G.T.H for people like you and me that challenge the ‘impossible’ making it true and know how to enjoy it!

F.A.I.T.H for those ones who live their lifes like there is no tomorrow and believe in ‘second chances’…

M.U.C.H M.O.R.E for everyone that feels the same today and always!!!


“we are so good together”


February 12, 2010

I had spent my time counting days.
Yeap, I did it since that I came back from London last month and just for one special reason: to be with him again. Hmmmm thinking better I would venture myself to say with more than 100% of sure that we both had done the same (yes, we think so alike and we are perfect on our own way!).

I must to confess that he have the power to make my day worth with one simple ‘hello gorgeous’ and this is awesome!
Also he can always makes me happy even being faraway from me and smile lots (people usually say to me that I’m so pretty smiling…so this is good – I think). Anyway, I simply love myself when I’m okay!

Well and this is ‘why’ I have expecting for today anxiously. Really I cannot realize that in a few hours we will be together again after have been apart for a while:

1641600 seconds…
27360 minutes…
456 hours…
well 19 days…

I know that definitely wasn’t so much time but was enough to makes me miss him a lot! Never mind, the important thing is that he is coming to visit me!

For my luck during all those days seemed that we were ‘together’ even with 1.310km between us… Perhaps because we were in touch all the time, every single day and yes we are connected by many different ways so we can reach ourselves almost 24/7 (sometimes he need to sleep…but it’s ok).

I can’t wait to see again his beautiful smile, to look into his deep blue eyes, to have his touch, to listen he speaking to me with his British accent so hot, well to be on his arms – all this is so magnific! #blushing
I have no words to describe it and I say: I never ever felt myself this way before!
I’m very glad and grateful to had found him without looking for… and this is so cool!

I am convinced: I’m the most happiest girl ever… for me he is one in one million!!! Tks a lot boy just to be how you are! #L
So I will finish this post with one song that I like… ‘Come Together / Primal Scream‘ is really hot and also rock my world!

Enjoy the lyric:

“Kiss me, won’t you won’t you kiss me
Won’t you won’t you kiss me
Lift me right out of this world
Trip me, won’t you won’t you trip me
Won’t you won’t you trip me
Lift me ride me to the stars
I’m free you’re free
I want you to touch me
Come touch me
Now it’s all too much
All too much
All too much
Come together oh oh…”

Cables…paths crossed

February 6, 2010

A few days ago on Feb 02th, I was walking around very inspired and floating mind, seeing beauty in everywhere when I decided to ‘catch my mood’ and this is the reason why I made this lovely photo (pls. have a look bellow!)

I’m absolutely convinced that life must to have a purport and I really like when I do pictures with special meanings.  Photography is one of my passions and after had checking out the good result I felt more than obliged to publish it on my Flickr and also here with some txt to express myself better somehow…

The history behind the scene: I was thinking about someone else really special. Yeap, he is special for lots of simple reasons… First of all to be this amazing guy that he is – no doubts about it! And also because I think that he is very alike me! Well I think that our history started before we meet (uncommon)… In fact either I know exactly what happened or when exactly everything begun, you know, simply just might to be.

Fate, coincidence…this doesn’t matter – what really matter is that my feelings are real and truthful! And I risk saying that we are doing very well, seems that we are perfect together!

I won’t lie or deny anything more, he ‘rock’ my world and definitely I’m enjoying all of it! Because he brings me joy, happiness, love to my life again and most probably that he doesn’t really knows how glad I’m for that…

Is good to have my mind set on him all the time (YES, I LIKE HIM A LOT!) Now I’m NOT afraid anymore to let he knows that – because seems that we felt almost the same so I think that is okay…

Anyway I’m fascinating for everything regarding this ‘new and wonderful world’ that I’d found even without looking for it…

I probably would love him even more if I had his physical presence more effective but it’s okay we still perfect even being apart and space everybody needs sometimes!  Once for all our history ‘together’ is much more and better than many ‘popcorn romantic movie’ or ‘silly cases of ordinary life’, you know…

For us doesn’t exist half-measures! For us is now or never, here and there, now and again because tomorrow can be too late.

I’m crazy and this is the reason that I say:  I’m in love!


I jumped!

Smiling without no reason…

December 23, 2009


Today I decided just walking around before come back to home and when I saw this bike on the street something has changed.
I could not resist and I took this picture.
I was feeling great and now I’m feeling even better!
I’m smiling without no reason (always and again).
I feel like I could float.
I miss you (…)  just for one day: TODAY
And it was just because that picture made me to reminds you…

É estranho...ter saudades do que eu nunca cheguei a ter.

[12-22-09 | 19h27]


note: I recomend this song to ‘feel’ the mood:

AIR / All I need

Bye bye today

October 18, 2009

E mais um “hoje” vai chegando ao fim com gostinho de missão cumprida. Sabem, eu conheço poucas pessoas que trabalham felizes num final de semana…

Ontem meu sábado começou antes das 10h a.m (+5h Milan) com um dos celulares tocando. Corrida contra o tempo: ADORO.

Foi preciso dar um pulinho na Agência, o que é  bem unsual durante o weekend a menos que algum “problema” esteja acontecendo…e querem saber, mesmo não querendo eu já deveria ter me convencido há muito tempo, de que uma coisa é certa: modelo é modelo e isso não muda nunca! Não importa o lugar do mundo que você esteja ou de que nacionalidade ela seja, quem trabalha com moda, vez ou outra, vai precisar arrumar a “bagunça” de alguma modelo por ai, e se ela for sua então, é obrigação!

Às vezes eu paro e penso: “será mesmo que era preciso ter vindo pra tão longe?” e a minha resposta pra essa domanda é sempre a mesma: “lógico que sim, oras!”, pois eu ainda nem cheguei na metade da estrada onde eu desejo parar! Eu quero ganhar o mundo, cada pedacinho dele, e eu já comecei a juntar o meu quebra-cabeça, sem deixar ninguém ou nada mais bagunçar as peças do meu jogo.

Bem só pra terminar de concluir sobre o meu “ontem”: eu só me permito dizer que esse sábado, mesmo estressante, foi excelente porque deu tudo certo alla fine e que dessa vez só competência não iria me bastar; eu tive também muita sorte e eu sei disso.

Melhor parte do dia: ao final, depois de tudo já consertado e resolvido, foi receber alguns elogios vindos da equipe de trabalho incrível que faço parte. Essas coisas são sempre bem vindas em qualquer ocasião e pra mim elogios não têm preço. ADORO MUITO!!!

Hoje acordei cedinho, as 5h fui acompanhar um shooting externo, tô morta, final de semana super produtivo. Muito frio, muitas roupas, algumas penas e uma outra equipe super animada que topou trabalhar de graça pra esse  editorial de outono lindo que deve sair na prox edição da InTown Magazine.

Sobre mim, bem eu ainda sou muito do tipo 8 ou 80, lógico. Às vezes eu exagero, eu sei, mas é talvez por isso que tudo sempre dá certo.

Agora já é finalzinho de domingo (pelo menos aqui pra mim) e eu ainda estou me sentindo meio que no céu… reconhecimento é bom d+ neh gente. E eu vou continuar o meu restinho de weekend descansando como posso, porque até quando não parece eu estou trabalhando! Contatos pelo facebook = trabalho; passeio com modelos = trabalho idem; participar de Ws, shootings, acompanhar de perto outros bons profissionais da área, tudo isso é trabalho até quando vem lotado de diversão!

É, quem escolheu viver no mundo que eu vivo até quando descança, carrega pedra. E quem sabe aproveitar da maneira certa e giusta consegue chegar aonde quer que seja abrindo portas; porque eu meu bem, eu não preciso entrar pela janela!  😉

É isso um ótimo início de semana maravilhoso pra todos! E vamo que vamo que o show não pode parar…

Last night

September 19, 2009

Well, tonight will be my last night at the old apartment…bad memories bye bye. A new life are coming and im feeling great!
From tomorrow will be a restart on my life! And you know what, tomorrow  20th of September, make exactly 1 year that I’m here in Italy! I can’t realize that when I saw it on my calendar… Bah, unbelievable I’m surprised! And its ok because I’ll be closing one cycle and is perfect think like this…
I’m loving my new lifestyle, so more exciting than before (for real!) …
Is unpriceless be myself!


I start to dicover a new city full of good possibilities, full of life, colors, sounds…
I don’t need anything more, my past I’ll keep away from me finally! Tks God for everything!
After tomorrow only good and new things will be part of my life. Only!
I’m self-confident that I’ll be ok by my self and anyway just in case, if maybe I need I knew how to made good friends! Thank you all I’m always thinking of you guys.
Very soon I’ll keep you in posted.
Cheers! Let’s celebrate!!!

Enjoy your life we only live once!

Enjoy your life we only live once!


September 17, 2009

Well my day was perfect, amazing really!
I have had a lot of good surprises today and I feel that is only the begining …
“If I can imagine so I can easily realize!” This is my new quote and I believe on this truely.

I wished have you here babe to share with you all my happiness!
But its ok, I need to understand…that´s complicated now, I made my choice to come back to Milan and I feel no regrets for this!
I´m a very luck person, definitely! And day by day I have more proud of myself.


Babe, next time just holding me tight  (L)

FRAGILE: now I'm on my own